Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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