I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
Four minutes until I can fart!
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline