I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
