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• (480): View more from Arizona

  Lets date for the summer

  (815): View more from Illinois

  what?

  (480): View more from Arizona

  Dont love me in September.

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  Say something about gay babies.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.

  (1-214): View more from Texas

  You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously

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• (325): View more from Texas

  Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?

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• 

  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (845): View more from New York

  I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.

  (845): View more from New York

  Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."

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• (316): View more from Kansas

  And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.

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• 

  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.

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• (707): View more from California

  Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.

  (425): View more from Washington

  I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.

  (541): View more from Oregon

  We need to stop going to pet stores high.

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• (971): View more from Oregon

  I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?

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