I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
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