I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
there is puke in my bra ... again
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