me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
