Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
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