you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.