can u get pink eye on your cock?
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I know her cup size but not her name....
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