This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
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Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
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It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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