Texts From Last Night

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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?

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  (734): Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa? http://tfl.nu/jog8
  Replies (32) Good night (3314) Bad night (1206) Order T-Shirt
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  (867): View more from Yukon/N.W.Territory

  Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.

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  (867): Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes. http://tfl.nu/k4jj
  Replies (13) Good night (2460) Bad night (1012)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.

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  (417): I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL. http://tfl.nu/srh0
  Replies (21) Good night (3689) Bad night (1450) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.

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  (847): i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen. http://tfl.nu/1m72
  Replies (47) Good night (11536) Bad night (2171) Order T-Shirt
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  (239): View more from Florida

  I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk

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  (239): I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk http://tfl.nu/44fq
  Replies (9) Good night (1165) Bad night (3146) Order T-Shirt
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  (904): View more from Florida

  I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion

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  (904): I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion http://tfl.nu/iqkp
  Replies (3) Good night (848) Bad night (3072) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.

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  (775): At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive. http://tfl.nu/xg7u
  Replies (4) Good night (2489) Bad night (1304) Order T-Shirt
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.

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  (803): He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face. http://tfl.nu/7qv4
  Replies (21) Good night (1202) Bad night (5247) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."

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  (717): He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird." http://tfl.nu/0yzz
  Replies (9) Good night (693) Bad night (3104) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.

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  (513): College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester. http://tfl.nu/dsii
  Replies (7) Good night (3181) Bad night (524) Order T-Shirt
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.

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  (778): the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting. http://tfl.nu/qa9b
  Replies (1) Good night (1198) Bad night (592) Order T-Shirt
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.

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  (678): I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex. http://tfl.nu/mbc3
  Replies (2) Good night (746) Bad night (331) Order T-Shirt
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  (718): View more from New York

  So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.

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  (718): So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you. http://tfl.nu/to2r
  Replies (3) Good night (1068) Bad night (210)
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  (585): View more from New York

  I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.

  (1-585): View more from New York

  I regret none of it.

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  (585): I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house. (1-585): I regret none of it. http://tfl.nu/t45o
  Replies (8) Good night (1076) Bad night (232) Order T-Shirt
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.

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  (804): The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation. http://tfl.nu/w1hq
  Replies (5) Good night (757) Bad night (185) Order T-Shirt

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