I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD