White coat. Heels.
Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend