Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.