Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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