Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize