Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
