I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize
