She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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