I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
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