Soap is not a condiment
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
