I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
