she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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