I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
