absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.