bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats