My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
If I die, sorry about rent.