I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.