the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
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