And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
