i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
20 People Confess What It’s Really Like To Live Under Sharia Law
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
21 Texts That Prove All the Magic Happens in Parking Lots
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend