so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
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