they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize