so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
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This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
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According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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