he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize