To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death