bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
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She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
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