Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
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