I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
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