WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
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My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
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If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
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