I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.