You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
