Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
This is the prime rib incident all over again
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
