Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
so let's talk penis.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
