it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
