Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Randomize
