hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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