Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
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