I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
