i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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