In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize