garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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